Free Falling Into Grace
Since my time in Georgia started this summer on September eleventh, one of our main discussions in every class has been identity. Who do we believe ourselves to be? I’ll be honest, I thought I had it totally figured out, which means it was time for God to come in and completely wreck me. And He did not disappoint.
Who am I? I said to myself “I am what my feelings say, what others say about who I am and I am what my actions say.” Well…I am overjoyed to never have been so wrong before. None of that really matters at all. It does not matter who I say that I am or what anyone else believes about who I am. The ONE important thing is who God says I am.
Does God care about my past? Does He care that on a daily basis I find myself judging someone that I don’t know at all, just for the way they dress or talk? Does He care that I used to say nasty things to people just to see them be hurt? Does He care about any negative thing that I have ever done in my entire life before now?… NO!
Thank. God. For. That. If He can see past all the ugly, bitter, hateful things that I spout out every day, then why can’t I? Who am I to pass up such a level of freedom when it’s being handed to me on a silver platter?
I have realized since coming here that my whole view of the world and myself was based on lies. “I’ll never really change on the inside, I can only change the facade that I choose to let everyone see.” I have recently replaced that with “I am justified (made right in the sight of God) freely by His grace”-Romans 3:24(NIV). Only God knows my heart, even better than I do.
It will take time to change the thoughts and habits about myself for my entire life up until this point, but I feel so liberated that I am starting the process. I am bringing every negative thing that I have ever experienced to the light and breaking the bondage that those things held over me.
I am experiencing a pretty phenomenal trust fall with God and I am expecting to have my mind blown by the level of love and grace that I have been and will be shown. It was no accident that we worshiped to “No Longer Slaves” this morning. It gave me the courage to write all of this out, and share my progress with others. What a way to start my week!
“You broke into the silence and sang Your song of hope, a melody resounding in the deep of my soul. You have come running, you tore down every wall, all the while shouting “My love you’re worth it all”….No sin, no shame, no past, no pain can separate me from your love.”– Unstoppable Love, Jesus Culture
